Hard work...and for what?

Hey everybody. How are we all feeling this week? I have yet again another blog topic that seems to just be me complaining, but that seems to be the general theme the past couple of weeks so I am just going to go with it.

So, I handed in a paper last week to another one of my classes and I spent a lot of time working on it. When I say a lot, I would guess approximately 5 weeks I spent on this paper. The professor let us look at our grades on Tuesday, but only let us look because it is his intention to hand back the papers on Thursday, and he gave me a 2.0! A 2.0! I do NOT believe it! I worked so incredibly hard on this term paper and he gives me a 2.0. Let me explain why this is an outrage to me. First of all, I have had this certain professor in the past and I have done many other papers for him. I have never gotten anything below a 3.7 in the past and suddenly I get a 2.0? What is going here? Second of all, I am a 3.5 student and above generally. So, the whole idea of getting anything below a 3.0 just naturally upsets me and I got a 2.0. Again, what is going on here? I cannot help but think that it is all my fault. Like I said, I have had the Professor in the past so I know exactly what he expects. Let me tell ya, I cannot wait to get this paper back on Thursday and find out what happened and why I am getting such a horrible grade. At least we have the opportunity for a re-write, right? I guess I have to look at the up side. Ugh...it just still bothers me thinking about it and even telling this story to everything following my blog!

Anyway, staying with the theme here, I am sure everyone has heard that saying, "When it rains, it pours"? After I leave class yesterday, I get in my car and I cannot wait to get home. I go to back out and someone backs into me! Give me a god damn break here! I am probably one of the most cautious people on the road and I saw this woman's reverse lights on so I waited what felt like an eternity before I even moved. She did not go anywhere so I decided to back-up. So I guess somewhere between all of that she decided NOT to look in her rear view and just slammed on her accelerator and backed up directly into me! And then she gets out of her car like it was my fault. Go figure she was talking on her cell phone. Ugh...people sometimes!

So I just thought I would mention this next thing. I wanted my blog to be about improving my writing originally and it has just seemed to be me complaining about life. But maybe while I have complained, I have improved? Has anyone noticed at all if I need help on anything? I appreciate any comments!

Complaining

Hey everyone. How are we all feeling this week? I feel pretty good after the workshop on Monday night. I am glad to know that everyone enjoyed my piece. When I first had the travel essay in mind, I knew I was going to write about my honeymoon. It was recent and fresh in my mind. I just hope it did not bother anyone because I know I talk a LOT about me being a recent newlywed, it is just so exciting! *exclamation points* Haha...I hope you are reading this John...

Anyways, my blog topic for this week is really going to be me complaining a little bit. I know...I know...I do this a lot, but that is just who I am especially lately because I feel like there is nothing I can do about a lot of this. And like my grandmother always said, "If you are going to complain, fix it. If you can't fix anything, do not complain." Back to blogging. I guess I feel a little lazy recently because I have had a few moments of pure and frustrating realizations. Number 1: What am I going to do with my English degree from Oakland University? Number 2: Am I ever going to get a job? Number 3: Will I go to graduate school and is it even worth it?

Well, let me attempt to whine a little but first about number 1. The best I can say is this: my options are totally open to do anything. A Professor told me recently that English degrees are a great thing especially now because English majors and degrees can write, read, and comprehend a lot better than most. He even added that most people in college do not know even how to write a well-constructed sentence, let alone an entire college paper. Do I believe him? Maybe just a little bit...

Now with number 2 it is a little bit more of a difficult question to answer than the others I have posted. And that is simply because no one can get a job right now, especially in our great state of Michigan. I only say this because I know from experience. My husband has literally put in 249 applications online and in our surrounding living area and he has not gotten one phone call for an interview. Let me make this clear: NOT A SINGLE ONE! And these places claim they are hiring. Why do they even bother putting a "Now Hiring" sign on their windows, doors, or post something online if they are simply not doing anything to hire anyone??? I was complaining about this to my dad the other evening and he says it has something to do with taxes. (For example, the next time people go to vote in Troy, they have a proposal going right now to keep the Troy Public Library open. But, the down side is, homeowners would have to pay more taxes a month in order to keep it open.) I am not one hundred percent what taxes have to do with it, but I am sure there is an answer.

Number 3. Well, again, that is still up in the air and it could go in either direction. I feel as though I have the grades and etc. to get into graduate school, but would it be worth it in the end? My adviser told me recently not to apply to graduate school with the hopes of finding a job afterward because the statistics are horrible in my favor. I feel like my BA from Oakland won't even be worth much, but that is just me complaining.

I apologize for all of this complaining, I just feel it all as to be said.

See you all next Monday.

Education and Experience

Hey everyone. How are we all feeling this week? Me? I am mostly good, but I only say that because I know that no one really wants to hear about all of my problems so I will just cut right into my topic for this week.

Has anyone ever heard of the lesbian poet Adrienne Rich? I am currently reading her for one of my other classes right now and I must say that I am very impressed with her so far. My professor lectured on her earlier this week about her beliefs and it has become so engrained in my mind that I just had to make my topic about her this week.

Her basic idea is this: anyone begins with education and experience in their lives; which, leads to people having certain ideas, thoughts, feelings or etc. Then that leads to why people believe what they believe. For example, if someone believes in God it is simply because they have been taught to believe in God, they have been told to believe in God, or they have had a certain experience in their life that makes them believe in God. But Adrienne Rich says what if everything people have been taught or told their entire lives is just simply wrong?

That is the big question: what if everything I have been taught or told is wrong? What if I am having certain experiences, feelings, or thoughts my whole life and all of a sudden I have been told that they are wrong? It is wrong for me to believe in what I believe in simply because whoever told me or taught me was also wrong. And here comes an even bigger question: why am I being told all of this now? And why exactly are my teachers, parents, friends, co-workers, and fellow students wrong?

I know that I have looked up to certain people in my life. My father, for example, has been an important mentor for me my whole life. Up until a certain age, I asked him for advice on practically everything. And now someone tries to tell me that he has been wrong this whole time? I do not know how others feel about this, but I cannot help but feel resentment; resentment towards the person telling me that my father is wrong, that is. But then, what if he really has been wrong? It is more than likely because what his father was teaching him and telling him was also wrong, and so on and so forth.

I have also looked up to my teachers and professors most of my life. What if everything they have been teaching me for the past twenty-three years has been a lie? What if when they answer certain questions I have, they are wrong? So my only question now is this: where exactly can our education and experiences come from? And how do we know when we are being told the truth versus how do we know when we are being told lies? I guess it is up to us to figure it out.

Until next time,

Mallory Etheridge.

Smartness?

Hey everyone. How are ya? Are there more disappointed people about the U of M game against MSU this past Saturday? Well, I can tell you that I am extremely disappointed, but I guess that is the way it goes sometimes.

Anyways, my husband and I actually got home from the game not too long ago and there was one single thought in my head the entire ride home (and for a good part of the time there). And that is that people are extremely inconsiderate or just plain stupid. Of course anyone can assume that Ann Arbor was totally out of control on Saturday, but why the "Annarchy" so to speak? (A funny term, but I felt I had to include it because as I was at a dead stop, the car next to me made that joke.) I tell everyone all of this because it goes into my very next point. This whole trip into Ann Arbor got me thinking in a larger picture: my "smartness". Not just when it comes to driving in horrible traffic, but also when it comes to classes, and pretty much life in general.

I cannot exactly say that I am the smartest person I know, but I would like to think that I am pretty darn close to it. See that is the thing, I know I am not the smartest person in the world, or the smartest person I know for that matter. In the past few weeks from doing the workshops in class, I have come to find that many of my fellow classmates have very valid and strong ideas and opinions that I would never think of myself. I am also in another workshop this semester for poetry. The entire idea of the class is just the same as this one, however we strictly write poems to be peer reviewed. Again, I know I am not the smartest person in the world, but I know what I know. And in my opinion, the people in my workshop in poetry are also much "smarter" than I would like to think of myself. They seem to understand what a particular poem is about before I can grasp any real concept and I read the poems over and over again. But wait, does that make them necessarily "smarter" than me? I am not sure, but I suppose that would be a safe thing to say.

Please do not get me wrong, I am not really saying that I am not smart or particularly stupid, I guess I am just finally realizing that I do not know everything and I certainly would like to know and learn more; hence, precisely why I am in school. I want to be able to take what I learn from all of my years in school and use them in my daily life and anywhere I go. Eventually, I would like to see myself being able to answer the same questions I asked in high school or college as a professor. The only question I have now is: how will I get there?

See you Monday everyone!